(Talking about "You're Beautiful")
Erin: The music video for that was so weird. He like... slowly strips and then jumps into a freezing cold ocean.
Tamara: Well, I guess that means that the girl made him so hot that he couldn't control his raging boner. Cory said he was thinking of this song when he first saw me.
Erin: So he couldn't control his raging boner. He saw you and then he starts punching himself in the dick screaming "GO DOWN. GOD. GO DOWN. WE'RE IN PUBLIC DAMNIT"
Tracy: He'd get a leash for it. Tie it to his leg.
Erin: WE NEED TO PATENT THAT. He gets fired later because someone catches him in the aisle mercilessly humping a box of cereal.
Erin: I'm going to put up a chart on the refrigerator and write each of my children's names on it and tally up how many years of therapy I'm going to have to invest in.
Erin: I'm going to give my child their sexual education by having sex in front of them. THIS IS HOW BABIES ARE MADE JIMMY.
Tracy: and then later in therapy your kid is going to be like "And and mommy was screaming for god. AND DADDY KEPT PUTTING HIS WEINER IN HER!"
Erin: I'm going to beat my kids for looking suspicious.
Tracy: WHACK! THAT WAS FOR WHAT YOU WERE THINKING ABOUT DOING.
Erin: *mimes writing* One more year of therapy.
Erin: Did you get new fish?
Tracy: Yea, those two black ones are new, that spotted one is new, that ugly fucker is new.
Erin: You have nigger fish!
Tracy: Yes, we have two nigger fishes.
Erin: I was recording my voicemail message yesterday and I kept tripping up on my words and I was getting ginger rage frustrated and the one I was like "Hey it's Erin, message to leave at the....." and then I took a deep breath and screamed as loud as I could manage "FUCK". Imagine if I would've kept that and my boss called. She'd be like "don't come back... ever. In fact, I'm getting a restraining order."
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